Giant Steps EP 3 "Da Club " (MATURE)

Giant Steps EP 3 "Da Club " (MATURE)
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    - Man, I really do gotta get to a gig tonight, you know?
    - Right.
    - But what's got me trippin', Mickey's late,
    all the other cats late.
    Mickey calling all these damn rehearsals
    like we don't know his simple ass music, right?
    Waiting around all day for these cats, you know,
    so unprofessional, rehearsal's supposed to have been
    like ten minutes ago.
    - Hey, man, we've got rehearsal in five minutes.
    - Okay, yeah, yeah.
    And the piano player, you remember Anthony?
    He keeps just hitting on my girl.
    - I saw that!
    - Did you see it, right?
    - Yeah!
    - [Ice Water] I looked up, I'm like--
    - [Second Man] What he was doing?
    - [Ice Water] Yeah!
    You know, just, he's a--
    - What's up, man?
    - Oh, yeah, yeah, what is up?
    You know?
    I saw you the other night, man.
    Just, like, all on my girl.
    You up and kneeing her like that.
    Fuckin' knee man.
    - He just--
    - Knee man.
    - He tripping about that bitch from the club.
    - No, you the bitch.
    - First of all, I was a little drunk,
    I was a little drunk, I do admit.
    - I know you was drunk.
    - But you just met the girl tonight.
    - Mofongo.
    - What did you call me?
    - I think he called you a fungus.
    - Ma-fuck you.
    Bitch ass motherfucker.
    (jazz piano music)
    - [Dr. Jeff] Whoa, there's a lot to unpack in that scene,
    and thank you all for joining me, America's psychologist,
    Dr. Jeff, on this installment of the Dr. Jeff Show.
    Now, like I said, there's a lot to unpack
    in that last clip we just saw, and we will get to it
    in today's show, celebrating the opening of Mickey's Place.
    Y'all remember Mickey, my frenemy, yes, Mickey,
    an olive branch to you, my brother from another,
    forget about it, mother.
    The first jazz club, Mickey's Place,
    to open in Harlem in five years, and that's right.
    Five years, can you believe it?
    And, Harlem?
    In Harlem!
    A Mecca and genesis of bebop and jazz.
    The forefather of R&B and hip-hop,
    where interestingly enough,
    if you want to sample this music,
    you can't even find it in Harlem anymore.
    There are not enough jazz clubs happening in Harlem.
    As a matter of fact, let me call a spade a spade.
    These jazz clubs are virtually extinct
    in our own neighborhood and ecosystem,
    north of the 125 Fifth where the rent is just too damn high.
    Well, look.
    I want to first start today with a discussion of Da Club.
    Yeah, Da Club.
    The jazz club, and its cultural significance in our history.
    I think the jazz club can be broken down,
    if you look at it, into three areas of importance
    in black culture.
    As we say,
    in uptown Harlem black culture. (mocks French accent)
    First, it was a meeting place or social gathering
    for jazz players and patrons alike, having some drinks,
    perhaps playing cards and, yeah, telling lies.
    Lots of lies.
    Secondly, it was a hunting ground where couples were born.
    And what I mean here is, cats,
    what they used to call pitching woo!
    And third, and most importantly, where that sound,
    that black nigga sound, yes, I said the N-word,
    (jazz music plays)
    that black nigga sound, was developed and cultivated.
    Now, let me give you an example of what I mean
    regarding the unique environment of Da Club.
    The jazz club.
    So, check this out.
    We hung out at Mickey's Place last Tuesday,
    and here's a snapshot of the social vibe
    in between the music sets with the jazz artists.
    I call it the gathering.
    Take a look.
    - [Male Speaker] We're supposed to be playing blackjack.
    - [Female Speaker] (laughing) I don't know
    what they are playing!
    - What you got, who needs a hit?
    You need a hit?
    Action, okay, here's that for you.
    Well, tell you the truth, there's this airline pilot,
    and yeah, yeah, JFK.
    Uh-huh, on the way to Paris, France.
    And, you know, got everybody seated and everything,
    and ready to go and all of a sudden,
    they get a call from the airline,
    the plane doesn't have enough gas.
    - [Female Speaker] What?
    - To make the journey.
    But, the pilot figures out, hey, I can make this journey,
    I can make this journey.
    All we gotta do's get rid of a couple people.
    So he makes the announcement on, you know,
    the plane is overloaded and we need
    to get rid of these people.
    We need to ask the people,
    starting with the letter A, B, and C,
    to please get off the plane.
    And so, he starts off with the letter A.
    - [Female Speaker] I need a card.
    - You need a card?
    Here you go.
    A ten.
    So, A is for African Americans.
    All African Americans off the plane.
    - [Female Speaker] That's kind of like...
    Yeah, I know, but that's the way it was going.
    Then they went to the letter B, that's for all black people.
    All black people gotta get off the plane.
    - [Female Speaker] What?
    - I know, it's cold.
    It's cold, it's cold.
    - [Male Speaker] And what was C?
    - C, that's for the colored people.
    All the colored people gotta get off the, now.
    You take a look around the plane
    to see if there's any other people of color on the plane.
    Oh, there's one guy, way in the back.
    See him?
    - [Female Speaker] Uh-huh.
    - You know, one guy, way in the back.
    Stand up, sir.
    How come you didn't leave?
    He said, because today, I'm under the letter N, nigga.
    - [Female Speaker] It'll save your life,
    I know that's right.
    - [Dr. Jeff] Now, see, right there.
    The club is where things are said,
    not usually in mixed company,
    and a safe place for otherwise poor taste.
    Oh, that poor young lady of Asian persuasion.
    By the way, airplanes use fuel, not gas.
    Now, check this out, the matriarch, I meant,
    the patriarch of the establishment, the one and only,
    my buddy frenemy, Mickey Bass on bass,
    is never short on an eager crowd of listeners.
    - You gotta be careful with a lot of these women out here,
    man, they're not really women, you know.
    I ran into a couple of 'em like that, man,
    they're almost foolin' me.
    You know, I almost, I saw this girl one time,
    I threw her back and that's when her fall fell off her head.
    And I found out she was a man, I was so mad,
    I almost let him go.
    - [Dr. Jeff] Mickey, I can tell you,
    has a million of 'em, and I know this personally,
    because I've had to sit through each one
    of his painful, crusty old jokes.
    Nice going, Mickey.
    So much for being culturally and sexually evolved.
    Now can you please join the 21st century,
    you neanderthal, base playin' mofo?
    That's right, they're coming for you right now, Mickey.
    Now, like any other social place, the Harlem jazz club,
    or what I call Da Club, is a place where jazz musicians
    use whatever amount of fame they may have
    or think they have to their advantage
    in order to hypnotize and capture their prey
    in the glorious pursuit of happiness and yin-yang.
    Now, they justify this pursuit because Lord knows,
    they ain't getting much money for the gig,
    and just getting some extras like, complimentary drinks
    and chicken lickin' dinners just ain't makin' it.
    But, that's neither here nor there.
    Let me tell you about some of the techniques
    they use to pitch that woo.
    First you have the looooong game woo.
    Now, this is where the brother tries to be indirect,
    supportive, unthreatening, you know.
    Vanilla, vanilla, vanilla.
    In other words, if he can bore her to death,
    she just might fall asleep into his arms,
    that's if her face doesn't fall into
    the plate of spaghetti first.
    - Mm, Jackie, somethin' playing with you, you know?
    I'm enjoying this.
    - Is it really?
    - Oh, yeah, now I know you're doing something else
    here in New York, where you playing?
    - I will actually be at the Blue Note.
    - Big time.
    - Are you coming, are you gonna come?
    - Yes of course, I'm going to be there, you know,
    I wouldn't miss it for the world.
    - Well, great.
    Awesome, I'm going to be looking for you.
    - Now, do you have any new recordings,
    'cause I wanna, you know, anything coming out.
    - I am working on a couple things.
    - Yeah, okay, when can we hear from them?
    - It might be in the future, I'm working on a couple things.
    - Sounds great, sounds great to me, you know.
    You know, so.
    Anything else interesting you have?
    I know it is.
    - Ah, no, just a little travel.
    - [Dr. Jeff] Then you have your smooth as silk rap,
    you know, like ice water.
    Cold blooded.
    Cold blooded, yeah, that's Rick James, dammit.
    You know, like the snake.
    Going in for the kill, and the thrill.
    Before she even knows what happened.
    - Pay me no mind, Kat.
    You know, I get crazy when we start drinking.
    - (laughs) I can see that.
    - Well, it's all good.
    Cheers to you, Kat.
    - You know, I'm one of the cats, you're one of the cats.
    - You just, you know.
    - That's so dorky (laughs)
    - Yes, back in the day, girl!
    Cheers, Kat.
    - Cheers.
    - It's been fun getting here, sitting and talking to you.
    - Yeah.
    - Tell me a little bit more about yourself.
    - So, I grew up in Ireland.
    - Ireland?
    I've been there before.
    So you do like to drink?
    - Yeah!
    - Get a little wild and frisky.
    - I don't know about frisky.
    - Wild?
    I know you get wild.
    - Well, my grandfather owns a pub, actually.
    - Ah, my man.
    What was his name?
    - Isaac.
    - Isaac.
    Here's to Isaac.
    (glasses klink)
    Here's to Kat.
    Here's to Ice Water.
    Put a little Ice Water on that Kat!
    - So how long have you been doing this?
    - Oh, a long time.
    I've been playing since I was a little boy, you know.
    And here I am now, you know,
    it's part of me to kind of travel,
    meet beautiful people, like yourself.
    You know, it's been fun getting to know you,
    why don't you, I'll call you sometime?
    - Yeah.
    - You know what?
    I actually, we don't have a pen, put it on my phone.
    That way I'll be sure to call you.
    - [Dr. Jeff] Okay, folks.
    Remember that clip I showed you
    at the beginning of the show?
    Where Ice Water took exception to Anthony
    hitting on his woman?
    Well, check out this next video clip
    and it'll give you more of the background
    as to why that particular confrontation happened.
    - Don't look, but, is this your man?
    Right over here?
    - So tempting now to look.
    - Okay, well, you know, it's--
    - Why do you ask?
    - I mean, I have to say,
    I been playing in this club a long time and,
    you the finest motherfucker I've seen.
    - Really, you don't say that to everyone? (laughs)
    - I swear, I swear.
    - Okay.
    - So, you're not together, are you?
    - No.
    - Okay, okay, just, I'm just, I work with the cat,
    you know, I don't wanna, you know.
    Start any trouble, you know.
    We play here every Tuesday.
    - Do you?
    You gonna come back?
    - I might.
    If you play your cards right.
    - Okay, okay, okay.
    I have to say that, that dress, Goddamn.
    - Yeah?
    - (sighs) Man, you feel my heart?
    - Should I? (laughs)
    - Yeah, do it!
    Feel it.
    - Ooh.
    - Damn.
    But, anyway.
    So where you from, where you?
    - I'm Puerto Rico.
    - Puerto Rico, I've never been.
    - Oh you should, it's nice down there.
    - Can I come back with you?
    - Yeah, you want me to take you to Puerto Rico?
    - Yeah!
    - You should take me to Puerto Rico. (laughs)
    - I would love that.
    I would love that, but you know, you know.
    - What?
    - I don't know that much about you other than, you know.
    Maybe we could, you know,
    go on a couple of dates or something?
    - That sounds nice.
    - We'll talk about it later after this.
    - Okay.
    - That would be good?
    - Yeah, that sounds nice.
    - Okay, that's what's up.
    - Damn.
    - I hear you like mofongo. (laughs)
    (club patrons chattering)
    - Mofongo.
    The knee man, over here.
    - [Male Speaker] Knee man.
    - Yeah, all right.
    - Yeah, I know it's all right, mofongo.
    - [Dr. Jeff] So this brings us to Anthony.
    Who I call the two-dimensional rapper.
    In other words, he is touchy, number one.
    And feely, number two.
    A low down, O.P.P. O.D.B.,
    that's Ol' Dirty Bastard, performing artist.
    But he likes to hit on his buddies' women.
    Excuse me one second, folks.
    Hey, Martín!
    Do I have an open hour this afternoon for the couch?
    I do?
    Call old knee man, a.k.a. mofongo, a.k.a. Anthony,
    and get him an appointment to get here this afternoon,
    and watch out for his rap, by the way.
    Oh, and bring me some knee pads
    in case that fool tries to go for my kneecaps.
    Next, check out this brother
    who has the audacity to call himself HeJaz.
    If you like a little corn with your flake,
    this brother is guilty as charged.
    Check it out.
    - Excuse me.
    Little boy, get out of the way.
    - You make a vegan wanna eat meat!
    - Nigga, please.
    - You fly enough to make Ray Charles see.
    Oh, sweet Lordy.
    What's your name?
    - Georgetta.
    - Georgetta?
    - Mm-hmm.
    - What a coincidence, that'll work, though.
    - (laughs) What's your name?
    - They call me HeJaz the brother who love to see cash.
    - Oh, okay.
    - That's right.
    - Okay, where you from, HeJaz?
    - Crown Heights, Brooklyn.
    - Oh, Crown Heights.
    - Perhaps I'll take you on a little journey
    over there, man, and show you the hood.
    - (laughs) Okay.
    (laughs) We can do that.
    - Mm, fine thing.
    You look like an Asian Barbie doll.
    Anybody ever told you
    that you resemble Chun-Li from Street Fighter?
    - Chun-Li?
    - He does this all the time.
    - You know he ain't nothin' but a bitch.
    - Chun-Li, oh!
    The one with the hair buns?
    - Mm-hmm, exactly.
    - He always talking to every chick that walk in the club.
    Now he a kung-fu expert.
    Chun-Li, Bruce Lee, he'd hit on Bruce Lee.
    - If he knew the way.
    - He couldn't fight his way out of a wet paper bag.
    - Lord knows if he knew what the bag was.
    - [Dr. Jeff] And I second that emotion.
    Negro, double please.
    And let me add one more N-word here.
    And not to upset anyone, that N-word is, Narcississm.
    So let me tell you, folks.
    I'm not just shouting out the brothers here,
    as far as their pathologies and prowling the club
    and putting out their psychological dirty laundry.
    Women, you know you play your games, too.
    And because you are the superior of the sexes,
    you play your game
    at a much higher intellectual, subversive,
    mind-melding Freudian and Jungian level.
    And the jazz club, yep, be real, provides you
    the perfect subversive cover for pulling off
    that superior kind of rap.
    - I had this weird queer friend,
    but I didn't know he was queer then.
    And he made me read all these books about, like,
    Eastern stuff.
    - Yeah.
    - And then he taught me how to meditate and--
    - Like Gandhi?
    And like Buddhism?
    - Like civil disobedience, yeah.
    - Okay.
    - Like, Buddhism and like, philosophy and--
    - [Dr. Jeff] Oy vey!
    So, this brings us to, arguably,
    the most important aspect of the jazz club.
    (jazz music) And that's the jazz itself.
    Now you know what I'm talking about, here.
    That black jazz, that, and I say it unapologetically,
    that nigga sound.
    Which can't be imitated just because someone graduates
    with a musical-slash-academic degree.
    But first, let me break it down
    with a brief history here, about slaves.
    First of all, slaves were brought to America
    and they were stripped of their culture,
    which of course, included their musical instruments.
    After the Civil War, freed men began to express themselves
    musically through Western band instruments
    left over from the military bands.
    Now, these instruments included trumpets, coronets,
    trombones, clarinets and saxophones.
    Essentially, they took that DNA of African rhythmic feel
    and vocal sound and translated it into the horns.
    (jazz trumpet)
    The trumpet.
    The sound of Gabriel, Miles Davis, Louis Armstrong,
    Freddie Hubbard, Lee Morgan, a perfect gauge
    of their human vocal articulation.
    The alto sax.
    The screaming sounds of Bird, unparalleled
    in expressing joy and pain.
    The tenor sax, providing the depth
    and gravity of human emotion.
    Think long tall Dexter, and John Coltrane.
    The trombone.
    Curtis Fuller and J.J. Johnson,
    showing the booming fluidity and twists
    and bends of light and thought and voice.
    Thumping the pulse of the Earth.
    Yes, Paul Chambers, Milt Hinton and yeah,
    you got it, Mickey Bass.
    The jazz messenger Art Blakey, Max Roach,
    beating out the rhythms of life.
    And piano.
    The Duke, Ellington.
    Art Tatum, Cedar Walton, yes, even Nat Cole.
    Playing all of the colors of the rainbow.
    Without a doubt, these instruments and their masters
    are telling us stories without ever having to say a word.
    Lord have mercy, a man ain't got a friend without a song.
    And unfortunately, Kim, your Op Ed on black jazz
    will not be accepted, will not be printed,
    will not be televised.
    But we will bring you the revolution.
    The true story behind black jazz.
    And its mother, Harlem.
    By any means necessary.
    So, Mickey's Place, well, it's right on time.
    It's not just a jazz place, it's truly a jazz messenger.
    So, Mickey, not to put too much pressure on you.
    But the pressure is on.
    Brother, don't fuck this one up.
    This is Dr. Jeff signing off,
    hope you had a jazzy and wonderful time.
    I'll see you all next week.
    - All right, Mickey Bass, man, Mickey Bass.
    Hey, look, man, you got it goin' on.
    I'm about to give you your props.
    You know what I'm saying?
    You boys swinging.
    This one, everything's cool, man.
    You got the joint jumping, I've got to give it to you, man.
    You got this party jumping.
    All right?
    My thing is, man, look.
    We can do this shit together.
    My thing is, you got the jumping, but guess what,
    shit is jumping on one block.
    I'm talking about taking this shit global.
    You know what I'm saying?
    That's what I'm talking about,
    I'm talking about this shit on social media,
    I'm talking about taking this little block
    and this little thing you've got going,
    and we're going to blow this shit up.
    That's what I'm talking about.
    Give jazz its due, man.
    So you get your boys, you keep 'em swingin',
    you keep 'em doing whatever you're doing.
    Give me 50 percent, but we're going to take this shit
    all the way, 100, know what I'm saying?
    - On the house.
    - That's what I'm talking about, that's--
    - Thanks for playing.
    - Respect this shit.
    This shit, still keep your damn eyes open, I feel it, man.
    Yeah, the one that you put that damn crusty toe on.
    (mumbles aggressively)
    (bebop jazz)
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