How to Create Unshakeable Self Esteem in 3 Simple Steps

How to Create Unshakeable Self Esteem in 3 Simple Steps
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    You can become someone you've never been. What? In this video, I'm going to show you how this guy turned into this guy and how you too can create unshakeable self-esteem in three simple steps. And stick around until the end for a fire motivational speech to help you get started. On this episode of The Dr. K Show. I'm Dr. Karthik Ramanan. I help ambitious individuals end self criticism with tools and strategies to create optimal everyday mental health. If you're new here and you know you need to get out of your own way to execute on your passions, I'm here for you. I encourage you to subscribe right now. It's showtime. This was me. Ivy league graduate. A highly proficient, top performing worker on Wall Street. And absolutely fragile self-esteem. How did I know it? I would fish for compliments like you'd not believe. I needed others to reaffirm my value in the world because I didn't believe it. I gave everyone else credit and blamed myself for everything. My foundation of my self-esteem was built on false self-criticism that, at that point in time, hadn't been addressed. Then it all changed in three steps. Number one, pick who you want to be. What do you mean by that doc? I mean, pick who you want to be. Design what the ideal version of yourself looks like. When I moved to Arizona to go to medical school after leaving Wall Street, I was on the flight to Phoenix and I realized something significant. NOBODY KNEW ME. You know how sometimes people just treat you a certain way no matter what you do? Well this was my chance to skew that in my favor! So I flipped down my tray table on the flight and started writing down what Dr. K of the future would look like. How would he act? How would he treat people? How would he think? What would his routines and habits be? Would he read books? I never read books to improve myself, eat well consistently, or any of the things I wrote down, but this was my chance. Design that ideal version of yourself. Put pen to paper, silence all your gadgets, and just dream like a kid. Don't edit yourself along the way. Just let the pen do its thing. Number two, do the things that this ideal version of yourself would do. In high school, I was relatively shy and definitely not a go-getter on first instinct. Yes I'd get involved in clubs, but only once I knew it was "safe" for me. Meaning, only when I knew I would be good at something. I couldn't handle things that would hit my self esteem. The greatest leadership position I took on was president of our chess club. In college, I didn't take on any leadership positions. In fact, I didn't even join any clubs the entire time I was there. So what did I do in medical school? I could have used my past as a blueprint and just been a studious doctor-to-be, but instead I chose to live into the vision of the Dr. K that I mapped out on that flight. I became student government president for the 400 plus students at the college. And then I served on the board of trustees of the college. And I was a consistent participant in several clubs on campus. Who is this guy? The guy I designed. Just start doing the things that the ideal version of yourself designed. You'll be surprised how quickly you start changing and building up your self-esteem along the way. Are you getting value out of this? Smash that like button. And if you're ultra awesome, type YES below. Number three, surround yourself with people that your ideal self would spend time with. Here's some brutal honesty for you. We spend time with people who reaffirm who we believe we are. Not who we want to be. Who we believe we are. Would your ideal self spend time with the toxic people in your life? Or would this version of you find friends who lift you up, who you inspire as well? Changing the quality of your surroundings is the fastest way to build unshakeable self esteem. Question of the Day: Do you believe you can improve your self-esteem? Let me know in the comments below. Today's Progress Success is brought to you by superstar client who is now over 40 days smoke free! I talked about her on the show a few weeks ago, and some remarkable changes took place since then. She's been around people and in situations where it would have been easy to smoke. And she's been under stress. But when asked recently if she wanted a smoke, she didn't say "No thanks." She blurted without thinking, "I don't smoke." She was surprised that came out. Here's what happened. We helped her shift who we believe she is. It's one thing to resist a cigarette. It's another to believe you're not a smoker. We take actions consistent with who we believe we are, and shifting who we believe we are is the only route to enduring positive change. You struggle with low self esteem, do you? I get it. I was there for decades. Hard truth. Who you were is not who you have to be. Your history does not dictate your destiny. I am living proof. Design the ideal version of yourself, live into that vision, and most importantly, change who you spend your time with. Be ruthlessly selective with who gets your time and attention. These people dictate the quality of your life and your self-esteem. I can tell you how you feel about yourself by talking to the five people you spend the most time with. If you're in a relationship or have someone close to you that's constantly putting you down, it's going to be difficult to build yourself up all the time. Think about it? Would you be able to build a jenga tower of blocks if the table were shaking all the time? Remove the obstacles to cure. If you want to build unshakeable self-esteem, start spending time with people who your ideal self would spend time with. If you could have it your way and there were no restrictions on your life, who would you spend your time with? Who would get your attention, care, and love? Hard truth: you spend time with people who reaffirm who you believe you are. If they're putting you down, you want to believe what they're saying is true, deep inside. You're afraid to face the reality that you are greater than you think you are. Start spending time with people who see your abilities, your talents, your capabilities. Spend time with people who enjoy your company and believe in you. Spend time with people who see you for who you can be. I believe in your greatness.
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